But this eel, it was...it was more than an alarm clock to me. To me it was...it was a friend. It didn't just wake me up every morning, it sang to me every morning, in the single monotonous note that was its voice. He had...a name (it was
Friday, July 23, 2010
I recently bred a special breed of fish that could be trained to make a very loud, annoying noise at the same time every day (I did this by breeding an electric eel with a vuvuzela) to replace my alarm clock which was deep fried in batter by the horrendous monstrosity, the Anti-Punctuality demon, who has been plaguing me with lateness of late. The biggest advantages to this eel are its distinct unfryability and its inability to be reset to some erroneous time or stopped from ringing.